Being a reader is a personality trait of mine. Or, at least, it used to be. I know when it changed. Me, 14 years old, getting my first iPhone. It was a white 4s. I loved it. Before then, I had only had one phone. A touchscreen Nokia that my mum bought me a couple years beforehand. Whenever I remember that phone I get a little sad for myself and my mother. It wasn’t a great phone and I still feel silly for picking it even though I was probably 12. Also, sad for my mum because I feel like I wasted her money on something that wasn’t amazing when that money probably could have been put to better use on something else. It’s a weird guilt.
Why a Nokia, though? I didn’t want to be like everyone else. Not in a I’m not like others way. I just prefer to try something else. What everyone else likes must be good, therefore I don’t need to get that thing because it’s already proven to be good. I can never seem to explain this sentiment to others, and it seems I still can’t say what I mean here. Oh, well.
I used to be the person who would say “Why are you all obsessed with your phones? They’re really not that interesting.”. I would get lost in these made-up worlds for hours at a time, becoming a part of the worlds that these authors had made for me. There wasn’t anything I really needed to escape from. But why live daily life when books had people who were magical?
My question is; when do i stop identifying as a reader? I don’t read anything close to what I used to before. I was an avid, emphasis on the avid, reader, going through 5–10 books a week. All the way through high school. Then I just stopped and started reading things on my phone, which doesn’t feel like reading to me. Last year I read maybe two books. That makes me sad. I used to love it so much and it provided so much entertainment and escape for me.
I blame my phone. My attention span has been completely decimated. I can’t seem to focus on anything for long. But it’s my fault for letting my phone do this to me. I made the choice to use my phone in this way. That’s the whole point of social media; to keep you on your phone for as long as possible. I knew that and it still happened. I’m going to try to read more this year, but I said that last year. We’ll see how that goes. Woefully, I expect.
Bye.
